What a whirlwind the last few weeks have been! For most of the winter this year, my work had been very busy trying to make accommodations to the budget cuts that Medicare made for 2010. Since the agency I was working for is non-profit and entirely Medicare funded, we were frantic to get as many clients on board as possible just to stay afloat. This translated into many long, long shifts. And it just got the point were I couldn't take it anymore. I was constantly exhausted. I was not much fun to be around not to mention a poor wife and helper to Tim. But I was making good money and able to contribute to a lot of good through the money my work was bringing in. I figured "things are "okay", I'll just muddle through."
Then Tim and I started reading a daily devotional about the names of Jesus. One week the name we were considering was "Bread of Life" and we looked at the message in John 6 where Jesus compares eating food that satisfies for a time and then leaves one hungry again whereas Jesus brings everlasting fulfillment and contentment. I realized that I was living my life at a mediocre level, just doing enough to get by, eating only the temporary food of this earth instead of letting Jesus nourish me. I began to think, 'what if even though this lifestyle is 'okay', but even though I don't see the end, what if there is something even greater out there that the Lord has planned for me that I will never realize if I continue to stay in this mode I am in?'
Tim and I began to discuss the possibility of me leaving my job and not taking another, simply being a housewife and helpmeet to him. Every thought, doubt, fear and anxiety imaginable went through my head during the time of decision. But I couldn't shake the feeling that if I just took this step of faith, the Lord was going to reward us greatly, even if it appeared to make no logical sense. After many weeks of seeking the Lord's Will, Tim decided that it was time for me to put in my two weeks notice. What an amazing ride it has been since that day. Once we took that step of faith there has been nothing but confirmation that we made the absolute right decision.
During those last few weeks at work I was able to talk with so many of my co-workers about my decision and the faith that Tim and I have that the Lord already has plans to work things out. Of course they told me I can come back at anytime. And I might. I have no idea how long the Lord has called me out of nursing. I am keeping my license active for that reason. Since being at home, I have already been able to assist Tim with things I never would have been able to do before because I was constantly wrapped up in work. So far, the Lord has graciously provided for us financially. We are prepared to sell our house and move into something we can afford better on our new budget, but so far the Lord has not even addressed that issue, so we are trusting that He already has a plan for that as well and we certainly do not want to push anything in the flesh.
God's economy works on faith and trust, not on dollars and cents. Tim has been moving forward with a calling into High School ministry at our church and we are excited to see the full fruit of this. The blessings have been wonderful, the times of trial have brought us closer to the Lord and each other and right now, we couldn't be happier with the simple act of stepping out in faith when the Lord calls you and following after Him in obedience. Tim and I are confident that this first step is just that. As more new and exciting things unfold for us, we will write more. Thank you to everyone who has been a wonderful support to us during this time of transition.
Here's to the new job title, Domestic Diva.
